Si Tenggang’s Homecoming

Everyone will be happy if their prayer has been answered. (Prayer in this blog should be defined as ‘doa’, not a person who pray). In my case, I should say being here thought me something more.
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Having a bad luck is one thing, being cherished with chances and opportunities are the others. But both mainly about testing human faith.
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Physically it is always human effort that make him succeed doing something. But behind that, it’s not just us.
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I was doing my dissertation this evening and last night and last other night. And many times I stumbled and lost. Not knowing where to go. Usually I will get on my bed, and start to think what will happen if I fail to submit my disso and do not graduate this September. Yeah yeah, I am worrying too much but that’s what happen when you stuck right? I cannot think about graduation ceremony and throwing the hat (hat toss) when I am depressed, can I? (Ah, this brings one good funny point. My friend from UIAM told me, ‘we can’t do the hat toss in our convocation’ Why? ‘Because we wear songkok for the ceremony. Takkan nak baling songkok kot?’)
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Just like usual, my story doesn’t end without some rambling.
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Back to the point where I was stuck. Berguling-guling on the bed (naah, English people dun hav the word. Rolling doesn’t potray the ‘guling-guling’ action as the word ‘guling-guling’ usually refer to an action done when you are worry or cannot sleep), I said silently, ‘God, help me’. And when seconds later I suddenly get a creative idea of solving the problem, I know that it wasn’t me.
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A simple analogy, in a logical mind, someone who stuck in a problem, let say money problem, or literally stuck in the car; he won’t be able to push himself out of the problem without some struggles. Without struggling, if someone gives him an amount of money, or helps him out of the car-stuck problem, then he’ll be able to get out of it.
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The point is simple, having a problem and just guling-guling on the bed is surely not a struggle. But to have an idea of solving it, is -a God’s action of answering my prayer.
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And there’s one thing I would like to remind myself. It is always harder when you get cherished coz you tend to forgot Him easier, compared to when you get sick.

Suddenly, I think about things that I am willing to talk to people and things I don’t like to talk about. Tujuan post kali ni cukup mudah, supaya kita sama-sama sedar yang setiap orang mempunyai minat yang berbeza. Maka janganlah membosankan orang lain dengan topik yang kita minat, tetapi tidak diminati oleh orang lain.

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This is my list. Let’s count it up.

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1. Car
What to talk about car? I barely reach 110kmph on the highway so I don’t care if a car can speed up up until 180 or 200. Teringat pulak waktu aku di Tingkatan 5. Antara kawan rapat aku ialah Anuar (x-SMKM) dan dia ada minat yang tinggi tentang kereta, enjin dsb. Sebagai seorang kawan yang baik (ini ayat sarkastik), aku pun cakap kat dia, ‘Anuar, boleh tak kalau hang tak bersembang fasal kereta dengan aku. Aku tak minat laaa’.

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Ari tu on the way ke Scotland, Tahir dan kengkawan dia duk bersembang fasal kereta. Aaah, aku terus tak join.

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2. Business
I’m totally not a business minded person. [Terbreak sekejap membaca 1-2 artikel Dr Asri. I like his articles a lot!]. Apa benda yek yang aku cakap tadi? Oh, tak suka bisnes. Ah yeah, once I was in my friend’s room and suddenly one of my friend come over and started to talk about some scheme. And how did I feel? Rasa seminit umpama sejam, sejam umpama setahun, and that is when people talk about business, not because missing someone, and that is surely not exciting for me.

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3. Sex & The City
Na ah, if you are not a close friend, don’t even ask if I have a girlfriend or not. Ari tu mamat kaunter kat kedai ayam goreng yang aku selalu pergi tu tanya aku. Nasib baik la muka aku ni bukan jenis blush, so takde la apa-apa yang terpapar, tapi telinga rasa macam panas jer. Segan laa.

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Ini termasuk orang-orang yang tetiba jer jumpa dan cakap, ‘rindu kat girlfriend ke?’. No no, serkap jarang sedemikian rupa juga membuatkan aku rasa sangat tidak selesa. Apa-apa soalan berbentuk sedemikian rupa hanya selesa dijawab dengan kengkawan rapat sahaja. Famili pun takleh tanya tau! (Oh my God, I’m a baaad guy eh)

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And don’t talk to me something related to sex. Again, if some close friends talk about it, I won’t feel very uncomfortable (double negative).

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In this term, I’m more into Japanese culture - you don’t ask whether they have gf/bf when you just meet. Aku pelik gak, dalam kelas Jerman aku (yg sudah tamat sekarang ini), kitorang belajar, ‘Sind Sie verhairatet’ bermaksud, ‘adakah awak sudah berkahwin?’. Macam kalo jumpa stranger, tetiba jer tanya soalan tu jer.

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4. Politics
In contrast of talking politics in debate session, I rather not to talk about it in real life. Kebiasannya kalau bercakap fasal isu-isu umum seperti tarikh pilihanraya, manifesto sedikit-sedikit, aku boleh terima la (walaupun suka dinyatakan, menaip perkataan ‘manifesto’ itu sendiri pun membuatkan aku terasa berat hati).

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END PART 1

To be fair, aku rasa perlu juga aku tuliskan topik-topik yang aku selesa bercakap. No, it’s not just about American Idol and Heroes.

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1. Language
Sounded a lil bit geeky but I always love to talk about language issue. Maths dalam BI, BM yang semakin diabaikan (sorry for being one of them), bersembang fasal Bahasa Jepun, Jerman atau Sepanyol, keunikan Bahasa Arab etc. That’s sounded like a cool topic.

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2. Ethics & Morality
Bercakap tentang masalah sosial, dan isu-isu berkaitan. Bermain sedikit dengan logik.

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3. Religion
You know that you have to talk about it to develop awareness. But I always love people who talk about it and relate to the current issue. Love to hear people talk with support of Quran & hadith. Since I was a student of Dr Asri for 2 semester, hadis-hadis yang disebut perlulah sahih.

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And most importantly, realizing the flaws I have, I always love people who talk in a soft way rather than pointing out in I-am-right-you-are-wrong manner.

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4. Your problems
Not mine. If you feel like needing someone to talk to, I’m okay. I won’t be a jack*** and stop you from sharing. However (ader je tetapi), the medium plays a lot of part. Meeting and talk is different. Seeing me online on YM is different. As you feel like sharing something, I might be here - mamai baru bangun, atau tengah makan; and you can’t expect me to pay attention, can you? Besides, reading text is so confusing. I’m not even sure whether you are stressing out, or sad, or just fine. Ever wonder why JK Rowling wrote hundreds of pages for a book? Yeah, to emphasize on the feeling.

It is just a bad syndrom I’ve been having. Sometimes when the full moon appears on the sky, shining the earth of this bloody cold place, I will started to feel tired but having urge to stay up the night. Well, it is true except that it doesn’t really happen during full moon as I can’t really see outside my windows whether it is a full moon or crescent or whatsoever; just writing it that way to make it sounded good. It did, didn’t it? [So much mumbling]

It is just weird. It feels like I still have something I haven’t finish for the day. Yeah, my dissertation, I know. But perhaps it is just me being worrying too much until my unconcious part of my brain also being affected. Uuh, I was able to make it looks so bad.

Okay, enough of that. As I feel like getting ready to sleep in few minutes.

I leave tonight’s post with 2 pictures

This picture is taken by Tahir’s friend looking-so-expensive camera. It’s taken from the top of Ben Nevis. So beautiful eh. Reminded me of James Blunt song - High

The second one. This is the comment section from Ayed’s blog entitled GoT 2 LeTs Go

Aku senyum jer bila baca komen Ayed ‘aku bukan nyer lutfi’. Ha ha. So I guess I leave some impression to people eh.

[baca tajuk dengan penuh perasaan, guna lagu Anita Sarawak].

Khalid, another Malaysian in Brunel called me and borrowed my bicycle. Dia nak turun pekan Uxbridge beli ayam. On the way balik, dia stop by jap kat bilik, dan check pc aku yg problem sebab takleh connect internet.

[terma PC bermula] Dan rupa-rupanya sebab tak detect IP automatically dalam setting TCP/IP disebabkan dulu abang aku pernah ubah sebab kitorang connect laptop to laptop waktu aku balik Malaysia, maka tu lah sebabnya aku tak dapat nak connect ke internet.
[terma PC tamat]

Dapat gak internet akhirnya. Tension wo takde internet. Khalid turut bersependapat dengan aku - kalo duk UK takde internet, macam duk dalam gua. Mana taknya, kalo kat Malaysia, bosan-bosan, atau keluar makan, boleh lepak kat mana-mana gerai ke, mamak ke etc. Kat sini, masak sendiri, nak lepak kat luar, sejuk (bagi orang Malaysia la, aku tengok bebudak Spanish/Italian yg datang sini untuk summercamp cam selamber badak jer lepak kul 1-2 pagi kat luar).

[Gambar: Tahir. Kitorang dalam langkah awal memanjat Ben Nevis. I particularly like this picture coz it really reminds me of Robert Frost' The Road Not Taken poem I learnt in Form 4]

  Chris yang first initate untuk jalan2 kat Scotland. Tahir excited jer. Aku tak kisah pun. Ada chance, aku amik. Malas nak excited lebih-lebih. Banyak benda lain yang nak kena risau.

Ain’t no mountain high enough

Dalam perjalanan baru la aku tersedar, bila Tahir cakap yg dia terlupa bawa glove. Aku ingatkan ala-alan tengok scenery dan enjoy the summer sun. Tapi aku terlupa, UK nih meskipun musim panas, angin bertiup kencang, dan suhu masih boleh jatuh.

Hari Sabtu kitorang pergi memanjat gunung. Ben Nevis. Yang seronoknya ialah sebab aku pakai belasah jer panjat gunung. Dengan tak bawak sarung tangan, pakai jeans, gunung setinggi 1344m tu kitorang panjat dalam 5 jam. Dan sampai atas, turun bawah amik masa 4 jam. He he, tak sangka la plak aku bleh buat bebenda cam ni. Yang lagi best, bila sampai balik kat cabin tepi tasik kitorang sewa (sounded ala-ala novel omputih kan), baru la aku t ahu yang Ben Nevis nih gunung tertinggi di UK. So, quite a big achievement la kiranya.

Hari kedua tak banyak sangat benda yang dibuat. Penat memanjat gunung. So melepak kat area-area situ. Jalan-jalan kat Balloch Castle.

Hari ketiga (final day) lebih best. Energy dah restored sikit. Kitorang mengejar steam train yang appear dalam Harry Potter dari tempat kitorang stay, Fort Williams ke Mallaig. Dia berhenti sekejap di Glenfinnan, dan kitorang tak lepas peluang untuk mengambil gambar dan perasan tunggu train untuk ke Hogwart. It’s the season of Harry Potter so, surely this is one significant way to enjoy the holiday, innit?

Baru la aku tahu yang sebenarnya, scene dalam Harry Potter yang train lalu kat gunung ganang tu adalah real, bukannya model yang diretouch guna computer.

Aku baru masuk scotlandthemovie.com dan check out yang scene quidditch dalam first movie juga sebenarnya berlatarkan Ben Nevis yang aku panjat tuh:)

So, that it is for now.

My Scotland story ended here. Chow:)

Dah seminggu tak tulis blog. Ada dua kemungkinan - tiada benda nak dikongsi (takde idea) atau tiada internet connection. Aku tak tulis blog disebabkan sebab kedua.

Agak bosan jugak bila aku dapati yang aku tak dapat internet connection dari dalam bilik. Rasanya plug telefon rosak. Maka aku berulang-alik ke PostGrad school jer untuk melayari internet. Sejak pindah masuk Selasa lepas, aku agak sibuk mengemas barang-barang.

Hari Khamis, aku pergi tengok Harry Potter. Okey la. Aku baca dalam 100 pages, adalah lebih kurang 15 minit benda tu dalam movie. Memang betul pun, banyak detail yang tidak ditonjolkan. But what more to ask?

As I am not a big fan of Harry Potter, I think that the movie is good. The character development is well potrayed but some question were answered too quick and didn’t dragged until the end. Contohnya cerita fasal Harry dan Cho Chang cepat sangat abisnya. Lepas-lepas Harry cam marah kat dia, terus takde apa pun kat ending.

Taknak citer panjang lagi sebab dah agak letih. Sekarang 2.18 pagi, baru jer sampai balik dari Scotland, bercuti 4 hari 3 malam, round 2 dengan Tahir dan kengkawan dia.

Nanti la aku upload gambar2 best yang kengkawan aku yang minat Harry Potter kena tengok:)

I was packing my stuff. I have to move into university accommodation until September. This is due to the end of our contract of living in this house. And it is pretty hard to renew the contract just for few months, 2 months for exact.

So, I decided to apply for university accommodation. Hence, the reason I was living outside is because I didn’t pay the deposit earlier.

Anyway. I went into the bathroom. And found out some leftover bath cream. We have a bathtub inside our bathroom but I never use it before. Probably because I did not want to spend a long time in the bathroom and let others waiting. Besides, I never hear other guys use it, so I am not sure whether it is cool or not. Now that everyone already move out and left the house for my own, and tonight is gonna be the final night I’m sleeping in the house, so I just let the water running and put some bath cream in the bathtub.

It is so cool looking the bubble started to fill it up. Reminded me of one of the Friends’  episode of Monica asking Chandler to try on some bubble bath.

Honestly, it feel nice and sensual. [Break]. I was just referring to the meaning of ’sensual’. I knew how to use it but barely know what’s the real meaning. At least I found out it doesn’t mean something dirty, that’s alright. Continue; the bubble is all over me and I felt like a lil kid enjoying touching the bubble out of curiosity. Reminded me somehow of when I was around 5 years old, and my mom let me ‘berendam’ in a red color ‘timba’ outside of my house in Felda. That was when I still fit inside it. Na nah, no bubble bath, but I can clearly remember how it feels like. Uuh, old days when I was still cute and innocent (come on, kids are cute, arent’ they).

Ooh, I’m so gonna have a bathtub in my bathroom once I work!

Gambar yang menimbulkan kontrovesi (sebenarnya perkataan kontrovesi itu kurang sesuai, tetapi saja nak guna supaya kedengaran macam dalam ayat dalam mag)
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Adalah sebabnya aku amik gambar ni, tapi tidak dapat diberitahu sebabnya buat masa ini. Nanti laa kalo aku rajin aku bgtau.
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Tapi mari lihat komen-komen kengkawan dalam profile aku dalam kurang sehari selepas aku upload gambar ini.
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Naz (x-Bio, PTD) cakap ‘setuju ngan shahrill… cam faizal pun ader gak… hehehe!‘ selepas Shahrill beberapa hari sebelum tu tinggalkan komen fasal rambut panjang aku.
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Fariz (x-roommate KMPP, x-USM Transkrian, Intel ek?) cakap ‘What happen to you man?? X potong rambut tu takpa lg, ngan tie tak terikat..mcm tension selepas kerja jer, hahahahha~~ XD‘ diikuti kemudian dengan ‘Aaah..aku tau ang nak tiru sapa, mesti Peter Petrelli dlm tv episode
Heroes tu, rambut dah kena dah, misai ngan jambang dah lekat dah~ waaa,
mantap siut..aku nak jadi Sylar la XD‘. Well, at least it is Peter Petrelli, so I am totally happy about it.

Ali (x-roommate KMPP, Medic USM) juga tinggalkan komen, ‘Lutfi, mukamu kelihatan tua n matang. Kalo nak nampak muda,dok dalam
bilik je. Kalo nak keluar, sila bawa umbrella. Anda akan kelihatan muda
10 tahun compare to other person (same age). Terima ini petua dr.‘ Terima kasih Dr. Takpe Dr, saya perlu kelihatan lebih matang supaya masyarakat Malaysia membenarkan saya kahwin awal (Malaysian ppl judge the capability of handling marriage of how mature you look, isn’t it?)

Kimi (Debat, Bio-USM) cakap lagi best ‘np serabut??putus cinta ker???‘. Soalan bagus…

Dan Nawal (Mass-Comm USM) cakap ‘wooooooooooooooo muka garang seyh!!!‘

[Flashback, gambar hitam putih] Sambil berjalan-jalan di Portsmouth, aku membetul-betulkan rambut sebab teruk ditiup angin, Tahir cakap, ‘You’re such a vain!’. Dia komen sebab aku selalu sangat pedulikan rambut aku.

[Vain =

Hari ni aku gi Portsmouth, bandar tepi laut betul-betul di selatan United Kingdom. Pelabuhan yang menghubungkan England dengan France dan beberapa negara Eropah lain.

Pergi 12 orang dengan coursemate aku. Pergi ni pun sebab school memang dah peruntukkan duit untuk dibelanjakan untuk aktiviti sosial. So sebab free dan tak pernah sampai tempat ni, maka aku pun pergi la.

Untuk penceritaan kali ni, aku akan masukkan gambar-gambar kurang pose untuk tatapan bersama. Yer la, selalunya aku asyik masukkan gambar-gambar yang pose cam best jer, sekarang cuba lak kelainan baru.

Gambar 1

Ramai-ramai melepak tepi laut. Aku yang hujung belah kanan itu. Bukan sedang berflirt-flirt eh, tapi sebab tangkap guna automatic mode 10 saat, sempat berlari ke situ jer la. Tak sempat nak panjat atas tembok tu.

Gambar 2

Tema: Gambar orang yang sedang mengambil gambar orang yang mengambil gambarnya. (Rujuk Dik Cerdas)

Lepak-lepak tepi laut. Dah hilang kan aura nerd tersebut. Serabai jer aku.

Gambar 3

Di Blue Reef Aquarium. Gambar bersama ikan pari.
Petak 1: Kagum melihat ciptaanNya. Ikan pari ni manja-manja, so dia duk menguak-nguak dekat orang yang tengok kat tepi
Petak 2: Kuakan ikan pari yang menonjol. Reaksi sangat nyata yang orang dalam gambar tengah terasa geli sikit.
Petak 3: Orang dalam gambar mencover balik aksi-aksi kurang macho dengan ala-ala pose seronok melihat ikan-ikan pari tersebut.

Gambar 4

Petak 1: Topi dipakai sebab rambut serabai kena tiup angin. Kembang semacam jer.
Petak 2: Jumpa toilet dalam bluereef, so sempat la adjust sikit-sikit. Udy cakap, nampak tak kembang, apa rahsianya? Tak la, dia tak cakap la camtu. Dia tanya aku potong rambut ke. Tak aku jawab, balik Malaysia baru nak potong.
Petak 3: Tahan la dalam 2-3 jam, posisi kembang mula mengambil alih.

Gambar 5

Guna automatic mode selepas 10 saat, ambil 4 gambar. Gambar berbunyi, ‘cepat-cepat nak kena posing. Ah, sempat gak akhirnya’

Okey, abih dulu setakat tu.

Ader lagi gambar lain yang okey gak kelihatan. Tapi saja untuk sesi ni, upload gambar-gambar yang ada cerita disebaliknya. Sejak kebelakangan ni malas sikit nak upload gambar-gambar personal sebab pose dah mula serabai. Susah nak dapat pose-pose innocent cam dulu. He he

I was just scrolling down my Friendster mainpage when suddenly I notice 4 of my friends are missing someone, which made me smile

a lil bit and wondering - is this the season of missing people?